A child funeral is a ceremony that brings family and friends together to remember the life of a baby, infant, or young child who has died. This service can be held in the home, a church, community venue or other location that has meaning to the family. The funeral can be a simple gathering or a full service and is often followed by a memorial reception.
This provides a time for people to come together and share photos, stories and anecdotes of the deceased. It also gives children an opportunity to say goodbye in their own way. For example, some families choose to hold a memorial service where they can see the urn of their child and then go home to plant flowers or have a small party in memory of their loved one.
It is important to talk to your child about the funeral ahead of time and explain what will happen, especially if they will be seeing the body. It is important for them to understand that the body does not feel cold, uncomfortable or in pain. If they will not be seeing the body, explain that there may be a portrait, an urn or other memorial display, or perhaps a video of their sibling playing. It is also a good idea to explain that the casket will not be open and that they are allowed to look but not touch.
If they will be attending a service, have someone that they trust sit with them throughout the event. This person can be there to answer any questions, reassure them and help them express their emotions if needed. Children who are actively engaged in the process tend to cope better with grief than those who are not. Consider having a child friendly ceremony and include them in readings, music or rituals. It can be helpful to give them a role such as placing a flower, lighting a candle or making a card to help them feel involved.
Children often have a hard time understanding that their parent or grandparent has died and need to be given the space to process their own grief. If they are too upset to attend the funeral, then a memorial service is an ideal alternative. They can have a say in how the day is celebrated by choosing music that reflects their personality, creating a photo collage or displaying any school projects or artwork they created. In addition, they can be part of the ceremony by writing messages on a message board or matted picture frame. They can also add a personal touch by having their handprints or footprints engraved on their marker. It is also possible to order a special shape or cutout to commemorate their love of sports or other hobbies, such as a golf ball or tennis racket. In addition, a balloon release is a wonderful way to honor a beloved family member or friend.