Planning a Child Funeral

child funeral

Whether your child was born at term, stillborn, or died in utero, a funeral is an important part of the grieving process. It provides an opportunity to say goodbye, share memories and pay respects. However, planning a child funeral is very different to planning a normal funeral. It is usually a smaller service and can be held at home, the crematorium or in the church.

It is normal for children to have lots of questions about the funeral ceremony. This is because they are trying to understand what is happening and how it will affect them. Make sure you answer their questions calmly and honestly. It is also a good idea to take them to the place where the funeral will be held before it starts so they know what to expect.

If you would like them to attend, arrange for a friend or family member to be with them throughout the funeral and burial services. This person can be there to explain what will happen, answer their questions and provide them with activities if they start to become bored. It is important that this person is someone the child trusts and feels comfortable around.

Many people choose to include special items such as a favorite teddy bear or baby toy in their child’s coffin. You could also ask a sibling to write a letter or story for their baby brother or sister. Some families also ask friends or family members to read a poem, song, story or reflection at the funeral. This can be a comforting and moving experience for everyone present.

During the service, you might like to decorate the casket or urn with flowers and other personal items. You might also like to have your child’s photograph displayed. This can help others remember your child and can be a very emotional moment for the entire family.

After the service, you might like to keep some of the flowers as a keepsake. You can either give them to other friends and family members or have them donated to local hospitals. Alternatively, you could have a few of the blooms pressed into a book to keep as a memento.

When planning a child funeral, it is important to take your time and be as creative as possible. This will help your family feel less overwhelmed and allow you to focus on the memories you shared with your child.

It is also important to be mindful of the language you use when talking about your child. It is not helpful to talk about your child in a depressing manner and you should avoid using words such as “death” and “grave”. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of your relationship with your child and how much they will be missed.

Many parents find that their child’s death brings up lots of emotions and feelings, including sadness and guilt. If you are finding it difficult to cope, please do not hesitate to seek support. If you are unsure about how to handle certain situations, it is a good idea to discuss them with your bereavement counsellor.